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    October 27, 2002

    the bottle has finally washed

    the bottle has finally washed up the shore, but it'll still be a week more before i can uncock it to read the letter inside. anticipation kills. just got to live thru this week. it'll be fun though, firing blanks counter-strike style, floating around with my armoured vehicle...

    sigh, wish endings were just as swift and decisive.

    Posted by zai at 11:59 PM | Comments (0)

    October 23, 2002

    started out with three projects

    started out with three projects to finish, managed to get only three quarters of the way thru one of them. too many dilemmas bogging me down this time around.

    never had this kind of problem before really... used to be able to step off cliffs without thinking when i was doing stuff for other pple. don't know why i've suddenly turned so cautious, scared of treading on that person's feet again. been having irrational and rhetorical thoughts all this week... hate battering myself with questions that can never be answered.

    it's not so much being afraid of not being appreciated, i've gotten over that a long time ago. it's more like fearing that it wouldn't work : that it's just a present like any other, nothing more or less, with no hidden meanings attached.

    anyhow, the offs been really great. section bowling was as exciting as it ever was. changing lanes was subtle and nicely done. got a new pair of hang-on earphones. learnt movabletype. met up with mervin finally. adopted a new theme song from avril lavigne : Anything but Ordinary.

    ***

    To walk within the lines
    Would make my life so boring
    I want to know that I
    Have been to the extreme
    So knock me off my feet
    Come on now give it to me
    Anything to make me feel alive

    Is it enough to love?
    Is it enough to breathe?
    Somebody rip my heart out
    And leave me here to bleed
    Is it enough to die?
    Somebody save my life
    I'd rather be anything but ordinary please

    ***

    wouldn't you say, that life, is beautiful...

    Posted by zai at 11:59 PM | Comments (0)

    October 15, 2002

    everything's finally over and done

    everything's finally over and done with. just glad to be back. =)

    don't have much time to write now, have to book back into camp in two hours time, but i promise i'll create a whole site dedicated to the past three weeks real soon.

    am feeling rather happy and flighty, nursing a childlike fascination deep inside of me for what the future might bring, now that my course is ending... seem have to forgotten all of my woes, if only for a while. think it's the aftermath of watching a really good movie and spending whole afternoon catching up with my best friend. never felt so recharged and ready to take on the world before!

    ***

    please be safe, please be well,
    please be happy wherever you may go.
    hope you'll find the ground
    whenever you break from flight.
    whatever your dreams may be,
    don't ever lose sight.

    Posted by zai at 11:59 PM | Comments (0)